the sense of life

A few days ago 1300 people died in a chemical weapons attack in Syria. My father, who I have come to visit here in Austria, is from Syria and, naturally, the television is set to the news all evening.

Arabic channels - delivered via satellite - apply much less censorship to the reality of a situation than American news stations and thus I was completely taken aback when I was shown images of dead children I would _never_ dare to look at following my own research of the Weltgeschehen. Not because I want to shield myself from the reality of the world outside my protected Western industrialized existence but because I don't need a visual to experience the pain and empathy a story like this ignites in me. However, seeing these videos has most definitely brought me much closer to the tragedy and horror of this crisis. It made me think about how deeply I have been suffering about a death I, thank God, did not witness personally and how completely and utterly worse all of these THOUSANDS of people over there (and in all the other crises areas on this planet) must feel. Death is such an omnipresent part of life and we - here in our modern world - so easily forget that because we are constantly shielded from it. At least, that is my personal experience.

In either case, it made me wonder about the fairness or lack thereof in life. Why am I allowed to recuperate from the passing of my most beloved man in the world, why am I allowed to enjoy the security and beauty of my home country (Austria), why do I have what I have and live where I live?

My father mentioned the other day how lucky and grateful he feels: Living here in Austria, having his house, good people in his life, health, financial security. "I always say, God must be content with me that he is giving me all these good things in my life." -- Although, I'm sure he didn't mean to be offensive, I find this statement to be thoughtless. What does that mean? All the other people who are suffering in this world aren't good people??! ... That can't be it, right. So, then why is there this discrepancy ...or, randomness, rather. Or, ...is it randomness?

The only way I can explain this seeming unfairness or random assignment of one's lot in life is by considering the concept of reincarnation. If there is such a thing as reincarnation then I can accept the divine set-up, so to say, because it would mean that, eventually, we all get a life in which we have to learn about true suffering. And in between all of our  lessons on human suffering we get to rest and have a good life, too. But, then again - this would only apply to extremes. Most lives aren't just black or white. They are a journey of fulfillment and suffering both.

As hard as these images are to look at, I think, they are a good reminder to be grateful - every day - for what we have.

And, last but not least, as horrifying as this is to see, I know now that death isn't the end and these children (and people) are now liberated from the suffering and the fear they have experienced for so long. It is the ones who are left behind who are left with the burden to carry and the deep emotional injuries to tend to. But - despite all my rationalizing, speculations about an after-life, or even reincarnation - sadness and a sense of injustice are still most prevalent in the emotional turbulence this incident has caused in me.



More information at:
http://thelede.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/08/21/video-and-images-of-victims-of-suspected-syrian-chemical-attack/