always with the timing

Just as I finally, finally sat down to create my first draft for this grief book I have been talking about, this song came on the radio:

Let go of me darlin’

Before you kill me

I’m hollow and holy

just like a man

and you never know me

the way I know sorrow

and crying helps nothing

it’s all i got left

.. .

you’re armed to the teeth

but it looks good on you

your slow embrace 

draws silence around me

you had no choice

it was the right thing to do

...

From the album "Dead Man Winter" by the Bright Lights.


(couldn't find it anywhere again but on youTube):

gravity questions

i don't quite understand the 8.4 IMBD rating of the movie "gravity".  yes, the images of space were nice but other than that, i don't understand why it warranted these types of accolades. maybe my judgment is clouded by the fact that i saw a crappy boot-legged version of it.

imdb image

for my taste, there was entirely too much camera spinning, upside down imagery, and hyperventilating. however, the reason, i'm bringing up this movie is because i couldn't understand why she wanted to live so badly, after having lost her 4-year-old daughter .. not having anyone left in her life. at some point, she actually tells Clooney's character to tell her daughter that she made it (i.e. she survived). ... why would she want that? either one of them? .. why is she even still alive in the first place. if i lost my only child .. and there is nobody else in my life, i think, i would kill myself ... or find someone to kill me .. since i'm not so sure that i could pull that off myself..

why some of us HAVE to make art

as i was staring out the window, nostalgically admiring the beautifully random twirls of the blizzard outside, the relentless, inevitable falls of millions of snowflakes, some dancing toward me through beams of light and streaks of shadows, dissipating as they touched the glass i had my forehead pressed unto, i thought about whether i would so fully and wholly appreciate this moment as i was if it weren't for the music in my ears - the fantastic, emotional but delicate background tunes accompanying the credits of the equally wonderful movie i had just watched [About Time]

as i stood there, tethered via my headphones to the laptop on the couch behind me, it occurred to me that - maybe- that is why God has put film makers, musicians, ... artists onto this world. they are story tellers and they connect people and people to life with their craft ... especially, if the stories they tell are about the human experience on this planet. theses stories or these notes can carry us through difficulties when we are lost .. showing us a light and sign that we are not alone in our suffering.

perhaps, we are meant to share our grief, our accounts of struggle and desperation, and ultimately our acquired wisdom - to guide each other and to see the world in solidarity, acceptance, and shared awe about its beauty. the arts in all its languages can be a powerful tool to build that bridge.

image from toptravellists.net